In a recent interview with Hollywood Authentic, Emma Watson described herself as “the happiest and healthiest I’ve ever been”. And this is for one reason and one reason only: she isn’t an actor any more.
The last time Watson appeared on film was in Greta Gerwig’s adaptation of Little Women six years ago. Since then, she has decided to lay low, largely because she considered the act of promoting her movies “soul-destroying”. And good for her; not just for refusing to strap herself to the machine, but also for slipping away so quietly that nobody had actually even noticed that she’d gone.
This is a rare skill. The world is full of actors who hate acting so much that they long to leave the profession behind, but so few of them can simply fade into obscurity as elegantly as Watson. So I’ve decided to step in and help. If you’re an actor who wants to take an extended leave of absence, here are the rules that you should probably stick to.
Rule one: don’t announce your departure
Emma Watson’s approach is in stark contrast to that of Daniel Day-Lewis; a man who, despite being the greatest actor on earth, is somewhat prone to a flounce. After completing work on The Phantom Thread in 2017, Day-Lewis announced that he had retired from acting, putting out a statement that read: “Daniel Day-Lewis will no longer be working as an actor.” Except, well, he is, because his new film Anemone comes out in November. The benefit to announcing your retirement so dramatically is that now Anemone feels like a far bigger event than it otherwise would. The risk, however, is that now Daniel Day-Lewis looks a bit silly.
Rule two: do announce a break
On paper, Tilda Swinton did something very similar to Day-Lewis earlier this year, by telling everyone that she had stopped making films. However, she added a very clever failsafe: she made it clear that her break would be temporary. Perhaps she’ll start acting again in the new year. Perhaps it’ll be later than that. It doesn’t really matter. By underlining that this is a pause rather than a full-stop, Swinton gets all the attention that Daniel Day-Lewis did, but won’t have to make such a public back-down.
Rule three: get a lucrative side hustle
Arguably, Gwyneth Paltrow has never been more famous than she is today. What makes this unusual is that, barring a few cameos on TV shows and in the MCU, the last time Paltrow acted in anger was in the 2015 Johnny Depp boondoggle Mortdecai. So why has she kept her fame? Because she managed to pivot into a glamorous businesswoman, as the founder and face of vaginal-scented candle brand Goop. In short, she no longer needs to act. This also means that people get excited when she does act. Part of the reason that this winter’s Marty Supreme is so hotly anticipated is because it represents Paltrow’s grand comeback.
Rule four: drop out at the bottom
After losing an Oscar (and then immediately leaving the ceremony) for his role in 2006’s Dreamgirls, Eddie Murphy hit an unfortunate spiral, making Norbit, Meet Dave, Imagine That and A Thousand Words. This run resulted in a Razzie for Worst Actor of the Decade, and a four-year break from movies. If you manage to drop out at the bottom, you can’t help but impress people upon your return. So it was with Murphy; 2019’s DolemiteIs My Name won him rave reviews as a dramatic actor. Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F reasserted his position as an action star and he almost single-handedly ran away with SNL’s 50th anniversary show.
Rule five: make your comeback vehicle extremely knowing
For a while, it looked as if Cameron Diaz’s turn in the 2014 Annie remake would be her final acting credit. Like Emma Watson, she decided to simply slip out of Hollywood unannounced to enjoy her life away from the grind. Similarly, Jamie Foxx’s career also looked like it had come to an end, after a stroke in 2023 left him gravely ill. However, this year the pair of them reunited for a film called – what else? – Back in Action, the Heard Ya Missed Me, Well I’m Back of perfectly adequate Netflix action comedies. Well played.
Rule six: actually retire
Believe it or not, but this does actually happen. People just stop making films forever, and seem entirely happy about it. After making The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen in 2003 (and griping to the press that he was “fed up with the idiots”), Sean Connery enjoyed 17 years of retirement before he died in 2020. Robert Redford’s last starring vehicle was The Old Man & The Gun, made seven years before his death. It has now been 15 years since Jack Nicholson last appeared on film, and it’s unlikely that it will happen again. Sometimes, like Emma Watson, the most dignified thing is to walk away for good.