Let’s be honest—deciding to raise your child vegan can feel like a deeply meaningful and intentional choice. You’ve done the research. You’ve had the debates (some louder than others). You’ve stocked your pantry with lentils, B12 supplements, and maybe a few “cheese” options that taste more like regret than dairy replacement.
But here’s what most people don’t tell you.
Raising vegan kids isn’t just about nutrition or ethics—it’s also about navigating tricky social dynamics, your own doubts, and other people’s projections. A lot of projections.
So if you’re considering this path—or already deep into it—here are seven things I wish someone had warned me about from the start.
1. You’ll second-guess yourself more than you expected
Even if you’re confident in your decision, there will be moments that shake you.
A birthday party where your kid stares longingly at a cupcake. A pediatrician visit that ends in side-eyes. A relative who says, “But don’t children need meat to grow?”
And suddenly, you find yourself lying awake at 2 a.m. Googling “Do vegan kids get enough protein?” even though you’ve read 12 articles confirming they do.
This doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. It means you’re a thoughtful parent. But the self-doubt can be exhausting.
Here’s what helped me: grounding in facts (like the American Dietetic Association’s position that well-planned vegan diets are appropriate for all life stages), connecting with other plant-based families, and reminding myself that every parent questions themselves—whether their kid eats chicken nuggets or chickpea nuggets.
2. Other parents might treat you like you’re judging them
I can’t count how many times I’ve said, “We’re raising them vegan, but we really don’t expect other people to do the same,” only to be met with defensiveness.
You’d be amazed at how quickly “Oh, we don’t eat animal products” turns into “So you think I’m a bad mom?”
This is the psychological phenomenon of moral discomfort at work. As noted by Dr. Melanie Joy, author of Why We Love Dogs, Eat Pigs, and Wear Cows, “When people perceive a challenge to their beliefs, even if indirect, they often experience defensiveness—even if no one’s actually judging them.”
I’ve learned to lead with curiosity, not conviction. If someone asks why our family is vegan, I’ll share—but I don’t try to convert. That helps defuse tension and keeps the focus where it should be: on the kids’ well-being.
3. School lunchrooms can be emotional minefields
Let’s talk about the moment your kid opens their lunchbox at school and hears, “Ew, what’s that?”
It’s not just about being different—it’s about being visibly different during one of the most socially sensitive parts of the day. And kids can be brutally honest.
My son once came home asking if I could pack him something “normal,” like Lunchables. Not because he wanted meat—but because he didn’t want to be the odd one out.
This is where resilience-building comes in.
We started role-playing responses. Practicing how to explain his food choices without sounding defensive. Making lunches that look fun and familiar (thank you, cookie cutter sandwiches and cute fruit skewers).
Helping your child feel proud of who they are—and what they eat—is part of the job description.
4. You’ll get surprisingly emotional about “firsts”
First steps. First words. First ice cream cone.
But when you’re raising a vegan kid, these moments take on extra layers.
I cried the first time we found a fully vegan cupcake at a bakery. Not because it tasted amazing (it did), but because I didn’t have to say “no.” For once, my kid could just be a kid.
You’ll also feel an odd sense of grief when they miss out on certain traditions—like roasting marshmallows at camp or decorating eggs at Easter. It’s not about the food. It’s about the memories.
But here’s the upside: you’ll get creative. We toast vegan marshmallows over tealight candles. We dye wooden eggs. You find ways to make new traditions that feel just as magical.
5. Doctors and dietitians are hit or miss
Some will cheer you on. Others will raise an eyebrow and ask if your child is iron-deficient—even if their labs are fine.
I once had a pediatrician suggest “just adding a little fish” to my daughter’s diet because “kids need DHA.” Never mind that she was already getting DHA from algal oil supplements.
This is where it pays to be politely assertive. Bring data. Ask questions. Be open, but also trust yourself.
As registered dietitian Reed Mangels has said, “A vegan diet can meet nutrient needs during pregnancy, infancy, and childhood when properly planned.”
If a healthcare provider doesn’t support that—or makes you feel shamed for your choices—it’s okay to find a new one. Seriously.
6. Your kid will ask questions you’re not always ready for
“Why don’t we eat what my friends eat?”
“Does the cow get sad?”
“Will Grandpa stop eating animals someday, too?”
Whew.
These are not yes-or-no questions. They’re big, philosophical inquiries wrapped in little voices. And they deserve thoughtful answers.
But they also hit you when you least expect them—like in the car line at school or while brushing teeth.
I’ve learned not to overcomplicate it. I keep explanations honest, age-appropriate, and rooted in our family values.
And when I don’t know how to answer, I say so. Then we figure it out together.
7. It’s not just about food—it’s about identity
One of the most unexpected things I’ve realized is how deeply food ties into a child’s sense of self.
When your child says, “I’m vegan,” they’re not just describing a dietary choice—they’re claiming a value system. One that might make them feel different from their peers.
And that’s both beautiful and complicated.
I’ve seen my daughter explain to her classmates that we don’t go to the zoo because we care about animals’ freedom. I’ve watched her ask if her soccer shoes are made from leather. She’s 8.
That kind of awareness can be powerful—but it can also feel heavy.
So we make space to talk about it. To explore what it means to live with integrity and openness. To stand up for your beliefs without putting others down.
That’s the long game, isn’t it? Not just raising vegan kids—but raising thoughtful, kind, critically-thinking humans.
Final thoughts
No one has all the answers. There will be slip-ups. Questions you didn’t prepare for. Snacks eaten at a friend’s house you didn’t approve of.
And that’s okay.
Raising vegan kids isn’t about perfection—it’s about intention. It’s about showing up, staying curious, and leading with values that matter to you.
If you’re navigating this path too, just know: you’re not alone. And you’re doing better than you think.
