- Caring for someone with diabetes can be rewarding, yet it can also be stressful.
- Roughly two-thirds of diabetes caregivers have challenges that impact their own well-being.
- If you have a loved one who is a diabetes caregiver, there are ways to lighten their load.
People who are living with a chronic disease, like diabetes, often require much-needed assistance from a loved one. While their work may be behind the scenes, these caregivers provide invaluable support. In addition to helping with the physical aspects of diabetes care, they may also offer emotional or financial support (or both).
While providing care to a loved one with diabetes has benefits, like helping them eat more healthfully, stay active and better manage blood sugar, it can also be stressful. “Caregivers are trying to balance everything in their lives, including partners, children and their careers. A lot of their life goes onto the back burner,” says clinical psychologist and certified diabetes care and education specialist, Nicole Bereolos, Ph.D.
The stress is so profound that research has found that roughly two-thirds of people who care for a family member with diabetes report multiple strains. As a result, they are likely to have difficulty sleeping, depression, body aches, headaches, chest pain and more.
That’s why caregivers also need support. Research has found that when someone steps in to support a caregiver, it has multiple ripple effects that can also improve the health of the person with diabetes that they care for. It betters the health and well-being of the caregiver, too.
If someone you love is caring for a person with diabetes, here are six expert-backed ways to make a real difference in their life.
1. Provide Tangible Support
A common—and completely understandable—thing we often say to someone going through a challenging time is, “Let me know what I can do to help!” That’s wonderful and well-meaning. However, nothing may come of this offer if the caregiver doesn’t know what they need.
“The best thing you can do is talk with them and brainstorm what might be possible,” says social worker and certified diabetes care and education specialist Eliot LeBow, LCSW, CDCES. Perhaps that’s picking up groceries, going to the pharmacy, running returns or picking up their laundry (and returning it to them freshly cleaned). Even a five-minute errand can go a long way.
2. Suggest a Break
Encourage your loved one to take time for themselves, because self-care is important for their own well-being. If they’re not sure what they can or should do, you can suggest some options, like getting a massage, going to their favorite fitness class, or spending time quietly reading a book. “When they can see that they deserve help and care just as much as the person they are caring for, this brings a renewed sense of vitality to their caregiving skills and dedication to their loved ones,” says therapist Christopher Pollock, LMFT.
3. Do Some Research
There are numerous support resources available for people with diabetes that can make a caregiver’s job easier, says Bereolos. Yet, they may not always be obvious. Some of these include access to hospital social workers, calling 211 (a line for essential community services) and contacting your county’s Department on Aging. There may even be resources available to the caregivers themselves, such as their own company’s benefits.
Why not offer to research the resources available to your loved one in their caretaking role? You won’t be able to access everything on the caregiver’s behalf (for instance, they’ll need to talk to their HR department about services and support available to them). But simply providing a list of resources with phone numbers and emails can help.
4. Be a Supportive Listener
Sometimes caregivers need a supportive ear to listen to their daily stresses or the difficulties of keeping it all together. Of course, it’s natural to want to offer solutions to fix their problem. However, to the caregiver, that can feel as if they’re not doing well enough on their own, says social worker Diane Mariani, LCSW. “[Holding back] can be difficult because you are talking to a person that you care about and love,” she says. “It’s best not to offer solutions. Instead, it’s good to provide a listening ear and validation.” You can do this by using reflective listening language, like saying “I can see why that’s so challenging or makes you angry. How can I support you?”
5. Spend Time with Them
It’s great to emotionally support your loved one and provide tangible help. But there’s also the social part, especially since social support is often lacking for caregivers. However, rather than letting them know what they should do, cater to their comfort and needs, suggests Mariani. For example, you can say, “I’d love to bring lunch over so we can sit and chat. Is that something you’d enjoy?” Or “In a couple of weeks, the group is getting together, and we’d love it if you could join us.”
If they can’t get away from work, offer to come over and play a game or some cards. Or, hang out in the kitchen and prepare a diabetes-friendly meal while they are working. As Mariani points out, the best approach is to open up the conversation, provide options and be adaptable.
6. Send Quick Check-In Texts
A caregiver’s schedule can be busy. A short text can be a great way to let them know that you’re there for them. Bereolos suggests a couple of texting options, like “I’m here for you when you need me.” Or, simply say “thinking about you.” These are short and to the point. Plus, texting is a nice way to check in with less pressure than a phone call or FaceTime. When they have the bandwidth to respond, they can (and they will).
Our Expert Take
Caregiving for someone with diabetes is no small task. “Caregiving can be stressful and life-consuming,” says Marinai. “As a chronic disease, diabetes presents a big life change and something that requires major adjustments that can be overwhelming.” Long daily to-do lists of administering medications, scheduling doctors’ appointments, grocery shopping and preparing meals can all create stress for the person providing care. As someone on the outside, you can help support a caregiver in your life by offering to pick up dinner or groceries, run to the pharmacy or post office, or research local diabetes care resources. You can also help out by suggesting a quick break, lending a supportive ear when they need to vent, spending time together, or simply sending a quick text to let them know you’re thinking about them. Because in the end, caregivers need TLC, too.